Sven & Ole's Miracle Fishing Lures-Lutefisk Lure-Gag Gifts-Jokes-Grandpas General Store

Sven & Ole's Miracle Fishing Loors
(fishing lures)

Made In America By Americans from parts made in countries,
with strange-sounding names, that you have to get shots to go to.

Are these real fishing lures? Yes, these are real fishing lures, with
real sharp hooks.

Aren't they just fishing jokes? Yes, these are intended as gag gifts,
for your avid sportsman or just for fun. They still have real sharp
hooks.

Will they really catch fish? They might...But it'd be a Miracle :)

Our present selection of Miracle Fishing Loors:

Sven & Ole's Miracle* Lutefisk Lure VII
The Flying Pig-Will it catch Lutefisk? Ya, sure, when pigs fly! Be
sure to check your FAA regulations!
LS-FPIG

The Flying Santa-Miracle Christmas Lutefisk Lure
Limited Edition - Miracle on 34th. Cast the Flying Santa Lure!
It's a well known fact that fish hate Santa. They don't have
chimneys and feel left out. The Flying Santa is the perfect ice
fishing lure. When the fish see him pop down that hole with no
bag of gifts, we guarantee the last thing on their minds will be
visions of sugar plums!
LS-FSAN

The Hail Mary Play-The Mother Superior Of All Lures
Most anyone who went to parochial school will appreciate this
one. Take your sister out for a drag... Endorsed by Bob Pope
From Vatican Grove, Ohio.
50% of all profits from this lure will be donated to Sven & Ole's Mystic Church
of the Big Fat Bank Account. All denominations welcome (fives, tens, twenties)
LS-HMAR

Sven & Ole's-Miracle* Lutefisk Lure II
The Spinning Swede Gag Fishing Lure
For Lutefisk And Other Gamey Fish-The finest Scandihoovian
Troll-ing Loor ever made!
LS-SSWED

Sven & Ole's-Miracle* (German) Lutefisk Lure IX
The Beer & Brat Gag Fishing Lure
Our cousins Hans & Frans, from Germany always catch more
fish than we do. Extensive research lead us to the Miracle
Beer & Brat Fishing Lure.
LS-BBRAT

Sven & Ole's Miracle Fishing Loors Presents:
The Ultimate Crappie Gag Fishing Lure-Sven & Ole give you
the straight poop on catching Crappies! You can't complain
about the smell of lutefisk, if you eat a fish with a name like
that!
LS-HCRAP

Sven & Ole's Miracle* Fishin' Loors Presents
HOLEY COW! Fishing Lure! The Dairy State Muskie
(Moo'skee) Bait- Sven & Ole heard a story, the muskies in
Big Muskego Lake were so big they snatched cattle from the
lake's edge. The strategically-placed holes in this lure, makes
a pattented cud chewing sound, that Yust drives those muskies (Moo-skees) crazy!
LS-HCOW

Sven & Ole's Miracle* Fishin' Loors Presents
The Basstronaut Fishing Lure-#1 Bass Bustin' Loor On Mars!
"One small step for fish" "One Giant Step For Fisherkind"
Endorsed by N.A.S.A.
(National Association Of Space Anglers) As Seen On TV!
LS-BASST

Sven & Ole's Miracle* Fishin Loors Presents
The Over The Hill Gag Fishing Lure R.I.P. (Reel In Phishes)
With Bone Rattlin' Action! Phinally a loor for over the hill
Phishermen!
LS-RIP

Sven & Ole's-Miracle* Lutefisk Lure XIV
The Official NFL** Fishing Lure- Norwegian FootsieBall
League- Cast your NFL lure into the end zone and retrieve
until you hit the line of scrimmage (this is where the fish bites).
Lures come with a variety of team (helmet) colors. Our pick.
**Not affiliated in any way with the:
National Football League, Nelson's Famous Lutefisk, Nortstrom's Fancy Lingerie,
Nedra's Frontal Lobotomy, or Naked Female Logrollers (a splinter group)
LS-NFL

Sven & Ole's Miracle* Fishin Loors Presents
SPWINT P.C.S.* Gag Fishing Lure Cellular Fish Caller
So quiet, you can hear a fin flop! You've heard of duck calls,
moose calls, cat calls, close calls? Finally a portable system for
calling fish! Fish Nationwide! 100% digital!
*Phish Catching System
LS-CELL

These Fun Fishing Gags make fine gifts for your favorite
fisherman, great jokes for the office, fun "souvenirs" for your
Scandahoovian (Scandinavian) friends or relatives!

Each Sven & Ole's Miracle Fishing Loor comes in a clear
plastic "clam shell "box, with illustrated silly story/ legend/
instructions for use, inside.
The box measures about 6 1/2" x 4 3/4" x 3/4". They will
vary in thickness, as the lures are all different sizes. These
gag fishing lures vary in size from about 2 1/4" to nearly 5"
in length.
These are "fishing lures", so they have REAL sharp hooks, under a plastic
guard. These gag fishing lures are NOT meant to be toys, and should be
kept away from children and pets and the fishing hook impaired.

Sven & Ole's Miracle Fishing Loors $8.95 each

SAVE BIG $$$$$$
Let US pick 4 assorted lures for you, and you can save $$$$$.
LS-SET4 Set of 4 assorted lures (our pick) $27.95 Reguarly $35.80

Lures & Stuff
Sven & Ole's Miracle * Fishing Loors
Miracle Lutefisk Lures

As promised, we were able to locate Sven & Ole (finally!) and
are now able to bring you "Sven & Ole's Miracle*Fishing Loors!

(These are also known as Miracle Lutefisk** Lures)

Each Miracle fishing loor, comes with instructions, in Sven & Ole's
own words, about how they came up with the idea for the lure, and
how well it works. They also provide the fisherman with tips, on
how to use the Miracle Fishing Lures to their best advantage.

These Miracle Fishing Loors (Sven & Ole's spelling), are here,
because the are probably the most unusual gag gifts, we have
seen. Most "men" are hard enough to buy gifts for. My own dear
Dad, always said "oh, just get me some new underwear", like
that is something real sentimental, he will always remember....

*Miracle Fishing Lure? Yes, it is a miracle fishing lure, because:
"It's a miracle, if you catch anything!"

**Lutefisk? What is lutefisk? If you have never had lutefisk, I will
let you in on a little secret... Just say no!
Lutefisk is the National dish of Norway, but even most Norwegians
gave it up, long ago, unless they live in Wisconsin. :)
Basically, lutefisk is smelly dried fish, soaked in lye (yes, she said,
LYE), and gently baked to a mush. This produces an unmistakable
pulp of jello like character, but some say is quite tasty, although
NOBODY eats it more than once a year...