Lotsa true stuff you should know! Below, is the Miracle* Lutefisk Lure FAQ. Hope it helps! ...
Miracle* Fishin' Loors F.A.Q
Frequently Asked Questions
F.A.Q. - Frequently Asked Questions
&
F.G.A. - Frequently Given Answers
Much care is taken to ensure that you receive the correct answers to your questions, but please be aware that we are compulsive liars and given to flights of fantasy and occasional alcohol impairment. In other words, we are FISHERMEN.
Rest assured that It's all the truth except for what's not. If you don't see the answer to your question below, feel free to contact us. Remember: "There are no dumb questions. Just dumb people."
Q: Is this the Frequently asked Questions page?
A: Yes
Q: Can I actually catch fish with these Loors? And by the way, how come you guys don't know how to spell "lures" correctly?
A: Loors is the ancient Scandinavian spelling of Lures.
Q: Do these Loors come with any guarantee?
A: Yes! All loors come with our exclusive "DOUBLE NO MONEY BACK GUARANTEE" and the assurance that "If you fail to catch a fish with our loors, You're probably fishing in the wrong spot!"
Q: Can I actually catch fish with these fishin' loors? And by the way, how come you guys don't know how to spell "fishing" correctly?
A: Fishin' is the ancient Scandinavian spelling of "fishing"
Q: What parts of the country do these loors work the best?
A: The wet ones.
Q: Do the loors come with directions?
A: No. You're thinking of a compass.
Q: How do I use my Miracle Fishin Loor?
A: Well this is a free country and I suppose you can use it any way you choose, but we prefer you use it for fishing. To help, we enclose a brief, but fact filled, instructional booklet with each loor.
Q: What do I do if I catch a fish on one of your loors?
A: We put hook guards on our loors to help you avoid being in that predicament. If you choose to remove them it's something you'll have to learn to deal with. Our Great Grandpa Ole always said "When in danger, When in doubt, Run in circles, Scream and shout". I hope this helps.
Q: In the booklet that came with one of my loors it keeps mentioning something called LUTEFISK. What is LUTEFISK?
A:#1 In ancient Scandinavia the diet consisted mainly of fish. With no refrigeration the only way to preserve fish was to let it dry in the sun. Unfortunately dried fish is so hard and oily that soaking it in water didn't re hydrate it, but the ancient Scandinavians discovered that soaking it in lye did. Sadly many of them died before discovering that lye was poison. Through trial and error they found that multiple rinsings in clean water removed the lye and made the fish edible (sort of) but it still smelled really bad and had the consistency bad jello. It is now only served at Christmas and other festive occasions. Lutefisk actually means Lye Fish.
A:#2 Lutefisk is the ancient Scandinavian spelling of fish.
A:#3 An ancient Scandinavian term that translates to: Road kill of the Sea.
Remember: It's called fishing, not catching.
Sven & Ole's Miracle* Fishin Loors
WIN
PRIZES!
Catch a fish with one of our loors and you could win a prize! You might appear on this website! Here's what you do: Send us the fish, the boat you caught it in, and all your tackle. Our panel of judges will determine if you win. If you don't hear from us, assume you lost.
Sven & Ole's
MISSION STATEMENT
To supply our customers with stuff. Lots of stuff. Funny stuff. Fishing stuff. Stuff to make them laugh. We know the world can never have too much stuff. You can buy our stuff with confidence, knowing that we would never lie to you or cheat you unless it was for money, cause that's the kind of stuff we're made of.
Want to see our current selection of Novelty Fishing Lures? Click here, to see Sven & Ole's Miracle* Fishin' Loors!
( Miracle* - if it catches a fish it's a MIRACLE! )
Please Note: Grandpa's is a small mom & pop, family run store. We do not usually work nights, weekends, or holidays. Feel free to contact us if you have questions that are not answered here. We will be happy to assist you!
